Growing Up

There is this point, where everything becomes your responsibility and you are seeing your family less and less. Then you look back and see that you have slowly grown up. Its amazing how your way of thinking has changed. Drama is no longer a concern of yours. School and your future is all that is on your mind. You worry more, but yet you have this independence that makes you proud of your own accomplishments. You look back and reflect on the years where you were not thinking of anything besides boys and friends. You continue walking forward and you see yourself having the same amount of fun, but in a different way. Your friends suddenly have matured and then you look at yourself and see the result of your parent's upbringing. then smile. 

You just rocked my world

Pre and Post Sermon.

I wasn't planning on writing about my experience giving a sermon, but I decided it would be cool to look back on this. I got to say though, Carrie Underwood is one of my inspirations, her song "change" is GREAT and it helped to to get into that sort of thinking when I was doubting myself and my actions.
Giving a sermon was something that would only play out in my imagination, but to my surprise, it actually came true. Although it was probably the most nerve racking and stressful few moments of my life. . . I think in the end, I felt it was worth it. My youth pastor told me that I wouldn't regret it, and I think him saying that was one of the convincing points for me.
I honestly do not know how I did it. I really believe that I was not up there. That I was not myself and that God just took over and showed me the ropes. An experience that is beyond words. Its crazy, if that helps in describing it. I think that most chilling thing for me was the conversations I had with people after. I felt like I was changed. Got had flipped my world.
I'm still trying to deal with the result of what God did. I feel like my mindset has changed. I honestly thought my mind was done changing (religiously I mean) but I was wrong. Its weird how God can just rock your world like that. I have never in my life ever thought that this would happen to me. I can only pray from here on.

But I do have one thing to say to whoever reads this.

IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU TOO. 

God can step in and rock your world. And when it happens, all you can do is stand there in Awe and watch your life change before your eyes.

Winchester & Berkeley

 

For a long time My goals have been set and my eyes have not looked away from my dream school, UC Berkeley. I had heard many good things about the bay area and how prestigious UC Berkeley was, so I told my mom that I wanted to visit the campus! She told me that she would make a reservation for August and we would go a couple days before my birthday. I was stoked!

I was finally going to have it all become real! My future was becoming materialized. I am only two semesters away fro going to Berkeley! Finally I will be able to dorm!

I told one of my friends about my trip to Berkeley and she threw me the news that she Also wanted to go to Berkeley. Of course, I quickly invited her to come with me and my family to Berkeley. Our parents chit chatted and soon enough everything was planned out!

My step-dad was actually excited to go up north because he had been wanting to see the Winchester House for a long time. This was finally going to be his chance. haha. We left about 9 am on Wed off to Berkeley!! My friend and I could NOT stop talking about how nice the campus was going to be and how the people were going to be so sophisticated that we would not be able to slap off our smiles. About 5 hours into the trip we finally arrived to our first destination. The Winchester House!

The Winchester house was actually pretty cool, yet creepy.

Basically the lady that owned the house had kept building on to the house because she thought she would live forever if she kept constructing and constructing. The house was really weird because it had stairs that were really low and some of the stairs would lead into walls. Some doors even opened up to drops! Like two story drops! it was almost cartoon-like. It still was a very gorgeous house. That lady was rich as can be. She owned many acres of land and married a very wealthy man. You might know about the Winchester Rifle. Her husband was the son of the owner of the Winchester Rifle. 

The next day we headed off to Berkeley quite early. I was stoked.

So was my friend. We kept talking about music and dorming and how nice the University campus was going to be. We got off the freeway and I wasn't expecting a nice area...but it was pretty ghetto.

There was bums and weirdos everywhere..I suddenly felt a bit uncomfortable, but I knew the campus wasn't going to be located RIGHT on the ghetto part. So I brushed it off and waited until I arrived to make judgement. We arrived, and I didn't feel any better. The campus WAS literally RIGHT on the ghetto part. You walked out of the school and BAM it was right there. It was gray, and wet, and cold. I began seriously thinking about whether I could go to school there or not.

We went inside the visitor area and waited for out orientation. The orientation was helpful in learning what kind of school I would be going to. It seemed so, boring..and serious. 

But that's school right? 

When I went to UCSB it was quite the opposite, and UCSB began to seem more appealing to me. 

I wanted to get away from the city and go to a place that was peaceful and a campus that is easy to get around. Berkeley was so hilly, and the beauty of the campus was not easily seen because it wasn't flat land. Then they told us about the housing. . . it was off campus housing and the tour wasn't going to show us where they lived. . .

I was just slapped with disappointment. But I'm sooo glad I went.

It definitely opened my mind to applying to more than just 3 colleges. 

I will still apply to Berkeley, because I know its a good school and it has its perks. 

Baby Gomez

Girlies and Princesses

I went to go see my math teachers baby today, and boy was it so adorable to Finally see him holding a baby. I think my class harassed him about having a baby from freshman year until we graduated. It was great. A momentous moment. I have never seen a man so happy in my life. I know he will be a good father.

I can't wait until shes older. Shes a beauty and I know that she will be a humble and smart girl.

Congrats to the happy family!

Dep Bug

Ways to Kick the Depression Bug,

1. Eat your favorite foods, but make sure they are healthy foods

2. Listen to classical/inspirational music (stay away from songs that you think Appeal to the way you feel. i.e. sad love songs, hard core rock songs, etc. ) Those will just encourage the negative emotions

3. Read a book that you really like, Water for Elephants is a good one, maybe try the Bible, or Mr. Darcy's Diary. Whatever your preference might be.

4. Take the focus off yourself, go do something for someone else. Maybe some community service work. I remember reading in an article that you feel better and its actually physically healthy for you to help others gladly. It gives you happiness and satisfaction. It sure beats depression!

5. Act a bit wacky. SHAKE IT OFF! Just goof off and be yourselves. Sometimes we just need to loosen ourselves up and have fun. Not in a Party Hardy kind of way, but in a Dancing in your room by yourself kind of thing. Talk in a British accent, or American accent if your already British! Do something funny with your hair and wear extreme sunglasses. Do what your heart pleases.

6. Take sometime to cheer yourself up. maybe listen to a Disney song (A dream is a wish - sleeping beauty), or just a good classical or upbeat (clean) song and take a walk. Take time to look at your surroundings. Notice the air running through your lungs and tickling your nose. Study the trees and the colors that surround you. Look up to the sky and think about the great world out there and the small world we live in.

Think about life itself and how its so incredible and complicated! but it works! I hope that the day you are depressed is a sunny beautiful day because great weather helps.

If its gloomy outside, maybe open a window and listen to the wind and the rain while you drink some hot chocolate and savor a danish. Wear your favorite Jacket, sweater, socks, shoes, scarf!

TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF! and put your feet in the sand, grass, water, or concrete. There are nerves on the bottom of our feet that are supposed to make us happy and more aware.

7. Pray Sincerely

WordPress & Corinthians

Can it be more complicated? I am so Frustrated with trying to make the layout the way I want it to look. I might just stick with blogger! Anyways What I wanted to post on Wordpress was what I read today in the Bible. Its in 1 Corinthians 7.

I found it to be actually really helpful. I like the Idea of not being in a relationship and only focusing on God. It clearly states in this text that staying alone and committed Solely to God can only be done by not being in a relationship. Its odd to think that anyone would not want to be in a relationship but nuns and monks do it!

At times I think I want to be alone and just focus on God. Although I'm not married, being in a relationship still takes away focus from God. It is almost disappointing, but in the Bible verse 8 it observes that some people cannot contain themselves, and those people should marry if they wish.

Expressing love is no sin, it does take focus of God, but some people feel the need for a life long companion. Adam felt that way and God gave him Eve to share everything with. Love is a wonderful thing, it is a gift from God. Life partners are seen well in his eyes, especially those who encourage each other and glorify the Lord. He sees great couples, and great individuals.

Sometimes the individual by him/herself is at best.

Sometimes the individual is best with a companion.

Awakening

Do you ever feel like you are stuck in a haze, and life you by day by day without change. Well, it is a normal feeling. Usually when people feel like they may not be in the right place in their life they think about dropping everything and leaving. But do they really do it? No.

People are frightened by the thought of dropping everything and leaving to do what makes them happy. We make up excuses to continue with our lives the way it already is. Change may be difficult but it is not impossible.

I always begin to think that if I had the chance to be the young rich man that was given the opportunity to drop everything and follow Jesus, I would have done it.

Matthew 19:16-26

19:16 Just then a man came up to Jesus and said, "Teacher, what good deed should I do to have eternal life?"

19:17 Jesus said to him, "Why ask me about what is good? There is only one who is good. If you want to get into that life, you must keep the commandments."

19:18 The young man said to him, "Which ones?" Jesus said,"'You must not murder, you must not commit adultery, you must not steal, you must not give false testimony,

19:19 honor your father and mother,' and 'you must love your neighbor as yourself.'"

19:20 The young man said to him, "I have kept all of these. What do I still lack?"

19:21 Jesus said to him, "If you want to be perfect, go and sell what you own and give the money to the destitute, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come back and follow me."

19:22 But when the young man heard this statement he went away sad, because he had many possessions.

19:23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it will be hard for a rich person to get into the kingdom of heaven.

19:24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to squeeze through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to get into the kingdom of God."

19:25 When the disciples heard this, they were completely astonished and said, "Who, then, can be saved?"

19:26 Jesus looked at them intently and said, "For humans this is impossible, but for God all things are possible." When we realize that we cannot hear the voice of God, and that we have not made decisions based on Him. We should stop and listen intently to what our lives are supposed to be like. Stop and pay attention to God's word. When you cannot hear his voice at home or at work or anywhere else because you are distracted by the things that surround you, leave. Go to a place where you feel that God will be the first and only thought in your mind. Then you will hear His voice. Just like Job heard God's voice in the silence. Walk and breathe in the fresh air. Walk as long as you need and disregard time.